Summer Lovin'

This summer, we three shall be tragically split apart by miles. Though we shall be pursuing our own dreams and finding self-actualization away from one another, a fine pair of magical pants shall keep us together in spirit.

OK - there are no pants, but at least Chris Seale does have a pretty sweet scarf.



During the summer months, our own Sammy shall be channeling Marie Curie. She will master the lab like a piano forte and corrosion shall be the beautiful art she creates.

Oh happy rust! May you bring Sammy her prosperous results and uplift her scientific spirit. A day without corrosion is no day at all! - It would be the false promise of shinny surfaces rather than the oh so beautiful reality of this blessed, comforting cycle of nature:

Grass shall be skipping around our nation's capital. Tasks include fetching coffee, ordering take-out, teaching old white men what "cookies" are, traslating FCC jibberish, hanging out with Big Bird, and cleaning the 'internets.'

Grass learned everything about the 'internets' from Oolong's lover, Ted Stevens. As an intern, Grass will most likely be stuck with the grunt work of cleaning the internets to make it run faster. In case you don't know what this looks like, see the picture below as a visual. Grass hopes to clean out as much as she can, but some of those tubes are long! Still, it must and shall be done.


Embunny will stay in lovely Charlottesville breathing in the pollen, holding old people's jackets, comforting overly attached parents, and secretly teaching the new first years how to chug. By the time fourth year comes around she will be an expert at get-to-know-you games, the COD, hiding car keys, streaking, and explaining what the hell ice milk is. All these skills are invaluable.



Last but not least, Oolong shall be playing alllllll summer on a farm.


By the end of the season, she will finally be able to identify all the animals by name. Then, perhaps, we can finish our musical lesson on "Old McDonald."

That's right, folks! No beaches for us! No vacations! No sun bathing! Just animals, internets, and rust please. This is how we like it.

Jealous much, punk?

Real Embunny: Adventures in Blog Authenticity

Embunny has officially declared African-American Studies as her second major. As such, she is undergoing a rigorous study complimented by graduate level reading, disguised in the misleading class of 102. Embunny anticipated one-hundred levels to take her back to the glorious days of first year - napping, frequent trips to rent movies from Clemons rather than study in Clemons, contemplating life, easy A's and high hopes for her GPA.

False.

Embunny now sits here, surrounded by aromatic candles to soothe her frazzled nerves, attempting to write a paper on what it means to really be black. Reference book of the week? This gem: Real Black: Adventures in Racial Sincerity.

Unfortunately, Embunny only knows what it is like to be real(ly) white. This book has provided her immeasurable knowledge however, informing her of the differences between racial authenticity and racial sincerity (oh yes, there is a large and sweeping divide). She also read an entire chapter dedicated to Mos Def and music. This was perhaps her favorite, inspiring Embunny to catch up on a lifetime's absence of quality rap music.

In response to this book, Embunny felt led to send her TA www.stuffwhitepeoplelike.com. She hopes to receive extra credit, especially considering the legitimate bonding she experienced with said TA over #97 and #16.

In other news.... think about asking Sammy about this new mystery man in her life. When she isn't busy relaying for her life, Oolong rejoices at the sparse flowers emerging around Grounds, and is knitting them capes to fend off the nasty non-spring weather that arrived after the first day of spring. Grass has conquered the school at last - we knew you would : ) Chris Seal has ventured quite successfully into the sweater business.... more to come...

Keep it real (authentic) (sincere).

pork chops

{{{Oolong shares a story told to her by her Hormones professor...}}}

In a zoo in California, a mother tiger gave birth to a rare set of triplet tiger cubs. Unfortunately, due to complications in the pregnancy, the cubs were born prematurely and due to their tiny size, died shortly after birth.

The mother tiger, after recovering from the delivery, suddenly started to decline in health, although physically, she was fine. The veterinarians felt that the loss of her litter had caused the tigress to fall into a depression. The doctors decided that if the tigress could surrogate another mother's cubs, perhaps she would improve.

After checking with many other zoos across the country, the depressing news was that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment. Sometimes a mother of one species will take on the care of a different species. The only 'orphans' that could be found quickly, were a litter of weanling pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in tiger skin and placed the babies around the mother tiger. Would they become cubs...or pork chops?

FML

So the contributors of GPC United have been having a pretty crappy week, and as the morose one it was only fitting that my first post would be of this nature. So here's how our weeks have been going...FML style.

Embunny: I have a real bunny in my closet. FML

Sammy: My baroque oboe is broke, and I can't fix it. FML

Oolong: I went to the gym today and got dehydrated...I was too short to reach the handle of the water fountain. FML

Grass: I have to write three papers about Fanny Price this week. She's so f***ing boring! FML

Chris Seal: I woke up this morning. FML

OSG terms

"huggle" - word coined by Oolong; somewhere between a hug and a snuggle (often done in stacks)

"Guilty Pleasure Club" (GPC) - a club founded by Oolong, Chris Seale, and Grass partaking in guilty pleasures

"meow" - an exclamation of happiness, despair, or surprise

"Italy" - synonymous with Germany according to Chris Seale

"Sad Panda" - a panda that is particularly sad and aggressive

"emo" - a tree disease

got the jitters

Poor planning led Oolong to visit the Clark Greenberry's just before it closed at about 10 o'clock, where she ordered a large coffee with room to amuse her taste buds while she typed busily away at her Jane Austen paper. She's been done with her paper since, oh, 3:45, but caffeine is a cruel mistress.

My Valentines Day by Grass

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single girl of sweet disposition and romantic inclinations must be in want of a Valentine."

FALSE!

As a girl who spent the bulk of her Valentines Day with Celibate Men of God at the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception and the Dominican House of Studies, I can defy this so called "truth" with confidence. Not only did my February 14th rock, but I got to spend it with some of the cooler people on the planet.



In fact, while others were satisfied with honoring St. Valentine (who died in APRIL, btw), we pulled our efforts into honoring St. Cyril and St. Methodius who brought Catholicism to the Slavic peoples. It was their offical feast day on Saturday. Now, when I strolled into Hallmark looking for my Cyril and Methodius Slavic merchandise, you can image how disapointed I was!



Other highlights from the weekend included Connor Breed's dog, watching two classy men chicken fight on the subway, and eating Valentines Day ice cream with Ooling, Sammy, and James (who doesn't get a nickname because Oolong has decided he is above such foolishness). By the BY, for future reference, Ben and Jerry's ice cream has a "cupid" discount on V day for the poor single girls out there shoveling it in. While I am single but not sad, it didn't take away from my appreciation of the $1.02 I saved. Perhaps St. Valentine IS looking after us all...



We proceeded to make our happy lists. Mine included napping, thinking of Helen Keller, and taking pictures of U.Va, and secretly ruling the world. Oolong hopes to find more pictures of baby animals to scare me with and Sammy plans on napping.






That's all for now. Oolong has promised a post soon. If we're lucky it will be related to knitting...

lovelove,
Grassss